Startline
by Ziek Aramaik
Summary: It's about Barry, before he was the Flash. And it's about meeting his predecessor and his protégé, before they were either to him. It's about the definition of family.
1. Chapter 1

_**I try to wash him out, but like they say (the blood is thicker)**_

.

Barry Allen can remember the first time he met Wally West. It was the day Wally was born.

"Wait, you mean the baby's born already?" Iris asked from the backseat.

"Yep," her father, Joe West, answered proudly as he drove to the hospital. "He was born this morning."

Barry stared out the window, watching the scenery pass by.

"Why are we only hearing about this now?" Iris cried out. "I wanted to be there for the birth. Why didn't you get us as soon as they went to the hospital?"

Barry turned away from the window and said, "Iris, we were in school all day."

She replied, "I can miss _one day_ , can't I? Besides, _you_ ditched school yourself not too long ago."

"Wait, what?" her father asked.

"No I didn't," Barry replied with confusion.

"The start of October, remember?"

"I wasn't 'ditching,' Iris. I had the flu."

"Barry, which is a better reason for missing school: Merely being sick, or the birth of an older brother's first child?"

"Just so we're clear," her father spoke up, "you really _were_ sick last October, right?"

"Yes!"

Barry and Iris were the same age, and they were in high school. But Iris' brother Rudy was older by several years, and he married early. This is why Iris was already an aunt.

They reached the hospital and rushed up to Mary's room. (They had to rush because Iris didn't give them any other option.)

"C'mon, Barry! You're so slow!"

"Geez, Iris! Don't yank my arm off!"

He understood why Iris was so excited. After all, the baby was _her_ nephew. This was a big day for the West family. Barry was just along for the ride.

The trio entered the room. Mary - Rudy's wife, Iris' sister-in-law - was lying back in her bed, holding her baby close. Rudy sat right beside her.

"Is he all right?" Joe asked. "He's about ten days early." He half-expected to see the baby through the glass of an incubator.

"Little guy was in a hurry to be born," Rudy replied to his father, never taking his eyes off his child. "But the doctors gave him a clean bill of health. He's perfect."

The baby was wrapped up in a bright yellow blanket. His skin was still red and raw, but he wasn't crying. The baby quietly stared at the group through wide green eyes.

"Say hi to your aunt and grandpa, Wally," Mary said.

Barry smirked at Joe. "How's it feel to be a grandpa, old man?"

He smirked back. "Watch it, wise guy."

Iris leaned close to the baby. "Hi," she whispered softly with a big smile. "I'm your Aunt Iris... And this is your Uncle Barry."

Barry blinked. "Uncle?"

"Uncle?" repeated Rudy and Joe, almost at the same time.

She looked around the room. "Yeah, why not?"

"Well... You know... I'm not _really_ a relative, so..."

Iris rolled her eyes. "Barry, we've been over this. You're not just 'some guy' who lives in our house. You're not a friend of the family. You _are_ family. Wally is your nephew just as much as mine."

Barry was part of the family. He had mixed feelings, hearing that from the girl he had a crush on.

He looked down again and gently touched the baby's hand. Wally wrapped his tiny hand around Barry's finger.

Barry smiled. It felt nice to be family.

But he couldn't help but wonder, _How are they going to explain me to the kid when he's older?_

.

The Wests were Barry Allen's foster family.

Barry's mother was murdered when he was eleven.

And Barry's father was in prison.

But he didn't do it. Though whenever Barry told someone that, their response usually was, "That's what they all say."

But Barry's dad really _didn't_ do it. His mom was killed by someone else.

Nobody really talked about it anymore. He knew that Joe and Rudy didn't really believe his father was innocent. Iris was the only one who ever listened, but sometimes Barry worried she was just humoring him.

The point is, this was why Barry Allen lived with people he wasn't related to. They were his family and at the same time they weren't his family. It was an awkward feeling, being with them during holidays and special occasions. The feeling got worse - and at the same time, easier to ignore - as the months became years and it really started to sink in that this wasn't temporary.

Barry's mother was dead and there was nothing anyone could do about that. Barry accepted that relatively quickly. But his father was alive. Barry kept hoping he would get his dad back. It took a long time for him to accept that his father would _not_ be released before Barry aged out of the system.

Knowing his real dad was still out there, out of reach, Barry could never fully assimilate into the West family. They tried to make him feel welcome, but Barry couldn't help but feel like he was intruding during these family events.

He was a person who belonged neither here nor there.

.

 _Dear Dad,_

 _Rudy's son was just born. Wallace Rudolph West. My first thought was "kids are gonna tease him with a name like that." But, that's life._

 _Apparently this makes me an uncle now. I thought it would be presumptuous to call myself that, but Iris insisted. She says that I'm part of the family. It bugs me that Iris thinks of me like a brother but_

Barry stopped writing. After re-reading the last sentence he decided to erase it. He never told anybody about his crush on Iris, not even his dad, and he wasn't about to start now.

 _...She says that I'm part of the family. I have mixed feelings about that. It's almost like saying I'm not family with you anymore - even though I KNOW that's not how Iris meant it. I guess what I want is for us all to be family together. So if I'm Wally's uncle, I guess that makes you his great-uncle. That's what I want to believe._

He hesitated. Then against his better judgment, he wrote another sentence. The thought would probably make his dad sad, but Barry still wanted to say it.

 _I wish you could see him._

.

 _ **Author's notes**_ : Originally this was going to be one of several flashback chapters in my other story "Fate Plays Favorites." But then I decided they would be better as their own fanfiction. Is it in the same continuity? This takes place so long before both "Fate Plays Favorites" and the canon cartoon that it doesn't make much difference either way.

While fiddling around with this story, I discovered that the Young Justice section only has 3 other stories featuring Jay Garrick on their list of characters. Only three? This makes four (If I finish it).

Chapter title comes from the song "Half Jack" by The Dresden Dolls.


	2. Chapter 2

_**I see my mother in my face (but only when I travel)**_

.

Barry Allen was now a college student. Since he was over eighteen, Joe West had no legal obligation to watch over him anymore. But he still encouraged Barry to come back during summer and winter breaks.

Barry was still good friends with Iris. They spoke on the phone often, while she was away at her own college on the other end of the state. The three of them still celebrated each Christmas and Thanksgiving together.

But Rudy alternated spending the holidays between them and Mary's parents. Truth be told, Barry didn't mind very much. He never really got along with Rudy. Which wasn't to say they disliked each other. They just... never really got along. Regardless, this year, Christmas dinner was being held at the elder West house.

"Merry Christmas!"

Rudy and Mary came through the door on a cold winter evening. Joe, Iris, and Barry rushed over to greet them. Smiles and hugs went all around. And special attention was given to the warmly-dressed little boy who held tightly onto his mother's hand.

Wally West recently turned five years old. Barry kneeled down to be eye-level with the wide-eyed redhead. The boy shifted closer to his mother.

"Well say hello, Wally," Mary told him. "You remember Uncle Barry."

When Barry was a little boy, he wondered why grown-ups always felt the need to comment on "how big he's getting." Now, as he looked at Wally, he probably understood. Barry only got a few chances to see him over the years. It didn't _feel_ like that long ago since he was looking at a small toddler in a crib. But Wally had somehow become a kid in only a handful of appearances.

Just the same, Barry didn't say it. "Hey, Wally. How are you doing?"

Wally stared at him, then he nodded quickly and looked back to his mom.

Was Barry this shy when he was five? Was there a time when he clung so close to his mother?

It was more than ten years ago by now...

A tiny part of Barry - a part which would never be given form by being spoken out loud - hated the holidays. Every milestone throughout the year was just a reminder of what still wasn't there.

.

Joe was preparing dinner in the kitchen, with a little help from Mary. Rudy and Iris were talking and catching up at the dining room table, with little Wally right by them. But Wally was getting bored listening to the grown-up talk and kept interrupting, until Iris kindly suggested, "Wally, why don't you go and talk with Uncle Barry for a while?" So he did.

Barry was sitting on the couch, writing another letter to his father. He wrote many letters in December. There was one his father would receive in time for Christmas, and another one describing what happened on the day itself.

"Wa'cha doin'?" a small voice said.

Barry looked away from his notepad and saw Wally staring up at him wide-eyed.

"Writing a letter," he answered plainly.

Wally climbed up onto the couch next to Barry. "Can I help?" he asked eagerly.

"Sorry, no." Barry put his pencil and notepad facedown on the other cushion. These letters were personal, and he felt nervous risking someone else seeing them, even if it was just a little kid who could barely read.

"Unca' Barry... Are you married to An' Iris?"

The question stunned Barry since it came out of nowhere.

"N-No. What? We're not married. No," he stuttered.

"Are you daddy's brother?" Wally asked.

Barry shook his head, wondering where this was going. "No."

"Are you mommy's brother?"

"No."

"Then why are you my unca'?" Wally asked innocently.

Barry probably should have seen that question coming, but he didn't.

It was like a needle jabbed into his chest. The awkwardness of his presence here was thrown in his face. But he couldn't be upset at this small child.

Barry searched for the words a child would understand. "When I was a little kid... I couldn't live with my mom and dad anymore. I didn't have anyplace else to go... But Grandpa Joe was really, really nice and he let me live with him, and with your dad, and with Aunt Iris. So... I'm not _really_ your dad's brother, but I'm _like_ his brother. And that's why I'm like your uncle."

"Why couldn' you live wi' your mom and dad?" Wally asked.

Barry froze again. He wondered why _that_ had to be the part Wally focused on.

"Well..." He didn't know what to say. Would a kid this young even _have_ a concept of death? Did he know what heaven was? Did he know what _jail_ was?

He skipped his mother and moved to the part that was - comparatively - easier. "Do you know what jail is, Wally?"

The little boy nodded. "Granpa's a cop and that's where he puts the bad guys."

Barry tried not to wince. "My dad's not a bad guy... People just _think_ he is, but he's not... He's in jail by mistake."

Wally said, "If you tell 'em your daddy's not a bad guy, they'll let him go." He spoke very seriously, like he was letting Barry know this for the first time.

"It's not that easy," he replied. "See, the bad guys - the real bad guys - they lie because they want to get out of jail too. Everybody says they're not bad, and the cops can't tell who's lying and who's not. So I have to _prove_ my dad's not lying."

"How?"

"Well," Barry was gradually talking to the little boy with more ease, "I'm studying to be a 'forensic scientist.' You know what that is?"

Wally shook his head. "Uh-uh."

"It's kind of like a cop, but he doesn't catch the bad guys. He goes to the places the bad guys were and he looks for clues. I want to make sure that what happened to my dad doesn't happen again to anyone else's dad. And... hopefully... I'll be able to help my dad too."

"Do it soon."

He smiled. "As soon as I can."

"No, _really_!" Wally insisted. "Grown-ups _say_ they'll do it soon but they never do. I wanna see him."

Barry stared at Wally. "...You _want_ to see my dad?"

"Uh-huh. He's my granpa too," Wally said. "You're my unca' so he's my granpa. You know, my other granpa and granma live far away too. I want all my granpas and granmas together. I want everyone together. And you wanna see him too, huh?"

Barry tried to speak, but his throat was a little dry. "Y-Yeah... Me too... I want to see everyone together too..."

"We're a big family," Wally said decisively. This innocent little boy had accepted Barry completely... Trusted him unconditionally... Believed in his father just because he was there...

"Yeah, we are." Barry reached over and hugged his nephew.

"Thanks Wally."

.

 _ **Author's notes**_ : First draft posted on 2/5/2016. What do five-year-olds sound like anyway? I'm eager for feedback on how I'm doing with this story. Chapter title comes from the song "Half Jack" by The Dresden Dolls.


	3. Chapter 3

_**I run as fast as I can run (but Jack comes tumbling after)**_

.

A few days after Christmas, there was a knock on the door, and Barry answered. It was Rudy, alone.

"I don't want you to talk to Wally about your dad anymore," he said simply.

Barry stared at him with a neutral expression. A few moments later he said, "I didn't tell him anything that wasn't true."

"That's not what I asked you," Rudy replied.

The two men faced each other. Then Barry stepped out of the way to let Rudy inside. Rudy stepped into the walkway and hung up his jacket. The winter day was bright and the snow had stopped, but there was still a chill in the air.

Joe met them in the living room. "Rudy," he smiled cheerfully, "I didn't know you'd be here today."

"I'm not staying long, dad. I just wanted a quick word with Barry." The two of them faced each other again.

Joe sensed the tense mood between them, and fell silent.

Rudy spoke first. "You shouldn't have been talking to Wally about prison inmates and whether or not they did it, even if he is your father. Wally's too young for that. So I'd appreciate it if you didn't mention your family to him again, understand?"

"So I can't mention my dad at all?" Barry asked.

"Pretty much."

"I have the right to talk about whatever I want," Barry said defiantly.

"No you don't - not around him," Rudy replied, not angrily, but with emphasis. "Wally is _my_ son. _I_ decide when he's old enough to be told certain things. You need to respect that."

"I kind of have to agree, Barry," Joe gently spoke up. "I mean, if Rudy's not comfortable with something then you can't just 'overrule' him."

Barry could understand their point of view - if he left his own feelings out.

"I still don't see the problem with what I told him," Barry said.

"That's because you haven't seen the aftermath Mary and I have had to deal with," Rudy replied. "Wally keeps pestering us to take him to _jail_ so he can visit his 'new grandpa'... Also, he now thinks there are lots of good guys in jail because the police don't know how to do their job right."

Joe - a policeman - looked at Barry with interest. He flinched under their stares.

"N-No... I didn't mean it like that," he told Rudy.

"But that's what he heard. You don't understand how impressionable Wally is."

"No, hold on. You're making it sound like I was trying to brainwash him. It wasn't like that, at all. He asked me where my dad was, I told him he was in jail, but he didn't really do it. That's all I said."

"You shouldn't have said anything."

"He _asked_ me. What was I supposed to do? Change the subject and hope he forgot about it?"

"He has the attention span of a five-year-old... because he's _five_."

"Look, Rudy... Believe it or not, I don't like telling people about my dad. I don't. I _hate_ the fact that he's in prison. But I shouldn't have to pretend he doesn't exist either. And I still don't see the problem with telling Wally the truth."

Rudy was quiet for a second. Then he calmly asked, "Did you tell Wally how your mom died?"

Barry was speechless for a moment. "N-No... I figured he was too young to hear that..."

"Yeah." Rudy stared at him expectantly. "Exactly."

"Well, I already told him about my dad," Barry said, "so what's wrong with talking to him about it again?"

"I don't want Wally associating with criminals," Rudy answered.

"I knew it! _That's_ what this is about! You're not mad because I told Wally his grandpa's in jail. You're mad because you think he's guilty and I told Wally he's not."

"It's not that simple."

"My dad's not a criminal. And if Wally wants to learn more about his grandpa-"

"Henry Allen is _NOT_ Wally's grandpa," Rudy shouted suddenly. "You're _NOT_ my brother, Barry. You're my foster brother. And since we don't actually live together, you're really not even _that_ much to me anymore."

The room was silent.

Joe quietly spoke up. "Okay, Rudy. You made your point. I think you should leave now."

"No," Barry interrupted. "I want to say something."

He took a few more moments to compose himself, and then Barry said, "Okay, I won't talk about it again... You're right. The parents make the rules, and if Wally shouldn't break them, then neither should I." Barry stared at Rudy sternly. "But I'm not wrong about my father, and before you leave I want you to admit that."

Rudy was exasperated. "Not this again. We settled this a long time ago."

"I know what I saw that night."

"You saw the Flash kill your mom," Rudy said skeptically.

The Flash: The fastest man alive. With his red jacket and steel helmet, he was a famous superhero since the 1950's. Barry had done a lot of research on the Flash.

"No, it wasn't the Flash," Barry replied. "He was faster than the Flash..."

.

 _ZOOM! "Mom...!" ZOOM!_

 _ZOOM! "Barry...! Run...!" ZOOM!_

.

"He was like lightning..."

Fun science fact: The electricity made by lightning actually goes _up_ towards the sky, not down from it. But when people look at it they can't see which way it's going simply because lightning is so _fast_.

"So you say a man even faster than the Fastest Man Alive, who no one has ever heard of before, has no motive against your mom, shows up out of nowhere just long enough to kill her and frame your dad, then disappears, never to be seen again... Do you honestly _blame_ people for thinking that sounds unlikely?"

"It happened," Barry said defiantly. "And I'm going to prove it and get my dad out of jail."

"Barry..." Joe spoke up again with concern in his voice.

He knew what was coming, and he tried to cut it off. "I _know_ what I saw, Joe."

"Barry, you went through something traumatic. And memory isn't perfect even under normal circumstances."

"I am _not_ delusional!" He turned to Rudy. "And I am _not_ covering for my dad!" He turned back to Joe. "Joe, a man broke into the house, knocked dad unconscious, stabbed mom, and left before the police showed up. That's the truth!"

"Even if it happened _exactly_ the way you said, you can't _prove_ any of it," Joe said. "SID went all over the house that night and they couldn't find a trace of your mystery man. Even if he exists and you dragged him to the police station, there's nothing to connect him to the murder."

"What about testimony? My dad and I both saw him that night."

"That puts him at the scene, maybe. It does _not_ prove he's the murderer."

Barry was silent.

By Barry's own testimony, the killer whisked him out of the house before the murder took place. Barry never actually _saw_ him kill his mom.

Joe continued. "Barry, I'm sorry, but your father's been gone for almost a decade. You _need_ to learn how to live without him."

"Even if I never get my dad back... Even if I can't make the judges and lawyers believe me..." He stared at Joe with watering eyes. "Is it _really_ so much to ask that the people I grew up with believe me?!"

Joe didn't answer.

"Sometimes innocent people go to prison. It happens, Joe... You're a cop; you _know_ it happens... Why can't you trust me on just this _one_ case - this _one_ person - my _dad_? Why is it so hard to believe?!"

Joe still didn't answer.

Rudy spoke up instead. "Barry, I've been very patient with you for a long time because I knew you needed it when you were a kid. But you can't be the victim for the rest of your life and my patience has limits. And when you start getting my son involved in this, then my patience goes right out the window... Your father is guilty," he said softly and simply. "Is _that_ really so much for _you_ to believe?"

"Yes!" Barry shouted. "Because it makes no sense! I know people automatically suspect the husband when a wife is killed but it just makes no sense this time! No sense at all! What possible motive would my dad have for killing my mom, of all people?"

"I don't know!" Rudy shot back. "Maybe he didn't want to pay alimony? People have been killed for pettier reasons than that."

"Rudy!" Joe shouted.

Rudy suddenly fell silent.

Barry stared at him in confusion. "Alimony...? What are you talking about?"

Rudy said nothing. He only looked towards Joe.

Barry looked at Joe. "What is he talking about?!"

Joe said nothing.

"Joe, if you think I'm going to drop this just because you're not talking, you're wrong."

After some more hesitation, he spoke. "Okay... Before everything happened, your mom and dad were fighting and... Well, nothing was finalized, but... They were talking about getting a divorce."

Confusion. Disbelief. Not understanding. "No they weren't..." Barry said feebly. It just didn't match up with the memories of his parents. They always seemed so happy... when Barry was around, anyway.

Joe looked at him sympathetically.

He looked back and forth from Joe to Rudy. "So my parents were divorcing and I'm the only one who didn't know?"

"When I became your guardian, your father asked me not to tell you about it. He didn't want you to know."

"That's stupid," Barry blurted out. "I'm an adult. I should know about my own family!"

"I agree," Rudy said. "Which is why I'm not sorry I let it slip."

Barry still didn't understand. "But why didn't he want me to know that he and mom were fighting?"

"Why do you think?" Rudy asked.

Barry was quiet for a long time.

Finally he said, "I need some air." Without bothering to get a jacket, he went out the front door.

.

 _ **Author's Notes**_ : (3/2/2016) Much tougher than the first two chapters. I was trying to avoid painting Rudy as a villain; the situation is more complex than that.


	4. Chapter 4

_**When I'm brave enough I'll find a clever way (to kick him out)**_

.

 _Dear Dad_

 _I've been thinking a lot about everything we said during my last visit. I went to see you the first chance I got after talking with Joe and Rudy. I was so mad at you for keeping secrets from me. We're already divided by distance - we shouldn't be divided by secrets too._

 _But now that I calmed down a little I guess I understand. You and mom never made it final, you were just talking about getting a divorce. I guess that made it easier to pretend it was no big deal. You said that after she died, it made everything you argued about seem stupid and trivial in comparison. You said you were ashamed of yourself for being mad at her, and you wanted to pretend it never happened. I get all that now. I do. But it did happen and you shouldn't have hidden it from me. I shouldn't have had to find out from Joe and Rudy._

 _I know what it's like to be embarrassed and wish something never happened. It would be easy for me to pretend you were dead or missing or away on business, but I don't. Even if I don't tell people about you right away, I never lie to them. Remember when you said I should change my name so people wouldn't know I was related to you? I want people to know I'm related to you. I want everyone to know I'm the son of a falsely accused innocent man._

 _You know that I believe in you, right? Even if the whole world turns its back on you I will always believe that you're innocent._

 _But just believing isn't enough. I want vindication. I'm still going to try proving it to everyone, including myself. It's because I believe in you that I'm not afraid of finding the truth._

 _So no more secrets, okay? I want to know everything about you and mom - the good and the bad._

 _But don't tell me to give up on you. It makes me mad whenever you or Joe tell me to forget you and move on with my life. You keep saying, "Children don't exist to help their parents. It should be the other way around." But I'm not going to forget you, dad._

 _I know you're frustrated because you feel like you can't help me from there. And you think I'm sacrificing my own life because of you (I'm not, by the way). There are a lot of parents who live in the same house as their kids but don't really care about them. But you, even though you can't "do things" for me, you're thinking of me. You're not worried about yourself at all. You just want what's best for me. People assume I'm the offspring of some horrible monster and they're absolutely wrong. No matter what anyone tells you, you are a good parent._

 _I love you dad._

 _Barry_

.

 _ **Author's Notes**_ : Posted 3/4/2016. I think this is the shortest chatper I ever posted for anything. Chapter title comes from the song "Half Jack" by The Dresden Dolls.


	5. Chapter 5

_**I'm so high right now (that even all your love can't bring me down)**_

.

Half a year passed. Barry Allen was at the West house again for summer break.

Not much had changed. His father was still in prison. He was still training to become a forensic scientist. He and Rudy were still uneasy around each other. Life went on, just as always.

Barry knew... that even if he became a forensic scientist there was nothing he could really do for his father. He wouldn't find evidence that the others overlooked... not at a crime scene over ten years old. Fantasies seem a lot more practical when you're a kid. The only point in continuing down the career path he'd chosen was to help prevent the mistake from repeating in other families.

But how often do false convictions happen these days, really?

Cleaning up the mess after a crime was already committed didn't sound very fulfilling.

As graduation year loomed closer, Barry's life was feeling gradually more directionless.

.

 _"It seems like the only reason you're studying to be a crime scene investigator is for your dad's sake, Barry."_

 _"That's not true, Iris. I can help a lot of families this way. I'm not being selfish."_

 _"That's not what I meant. I think you should be a little more selfish. You can't help other people if you don't take care of yourself too. And your dad's said the same thing, right?" Iris told him, "I know you don't like thinking this way, but stop worrying about your family, just for one minute... What do **you** want to do, Barry?"_

.

He still didn't have the right answer...

"Crunch."

That sound broke Barry out of his thoughts.

Feeling a little down in the dumps again, he was aimlessly walking down the sidewalk in the late afternoon. He lifted his foot and saw that he stepped on a dried leaf. Now that he noticed it, there were a lot of brown dead leaves scattered on the ground. There were a few small trees planted close the sidewalk, and their branches were all bare and withered. Every single leaf had fallen.

"But it's summer..." Barry whispered.

He stepped toward the closest tree. He touched the bark and looked up at the withered branches. Seeing the cloudy sky through those twisted black sticks made Barry think of Halloween. It was like the life was sucked right out of this tree.

"It's way too early for this..."

Barry had stopped in front of a warehouse. He never knew what this building was used for - never saw any people or trucks go in or out. It was probably out of business and empty. The large shutter door in the front was rolled up.

Barry slowly went in.

The room beyond the shutters was wide, open, and badly lit. It took several seconds for Barry's eyes to adjust to the shadows, and once they did he made a noise that was both a gasp and a shudder. Three people lay motionless on the floor. There was no blood, no wounds of any kind on their bodies, but it still looked like a murder scene - Barry would know, he was studying them.

A fourth person stood over them, wearing a long dark robe and a hood. He held a rock that briefly glowed a deep red shine, then faded. The hooded man looked at Barry and very calmly said, "Don't be scared. I promise that your life will be extracted for a very worthy cause."

"Aaahhhhh!"

Barry turned and ran as fast as his legs would take him, which - despite his long experience of running from bullies - he admitted was not extremely fast.

He made it outside the warehouse and back into the daylight. As Barry's sneakers pounded on the concrete, the hooded man's red stone glowed briefly, and suddenly the ground beneath Barry's feet turned slick and oily. He slipped and crashed to a stop.

Barry rolled over to see his pursuer. The hooded man calmly stepped over the ground which had turned solid again. He aimed his red stone at Barry, but a new man suddenly ran between them. He moved so fast that he was a blur before he skidded to a stop. Barry's eyes widened. Even from behind, he recognized this person.

Blue pants. A bright red jacket. Gray hair peaking out from beneath a steel infantry helmet. It was the Flash: the fastest man alive.

Looking at that man, Barry felt something inside him. An intense, passionate emotion appeared somewhere deep inside Barry's body.

It was probably hate.

"I finally found you, Doctor Alchemy," the Flash said.

The hooded man - Dr. Alchemy - looked at the newcomer cautiously. "You followed me all the way from Keystone City... Just once, I wanted to finish a project without you ruining things."

"You're trying to make another Philosopher's Stone, aren't you?"

"Any novice alchemist can make a Philosopher's Stone. I'm taking human souls to create a perfectly formed Philosopher's Stone - An Ultimate Philosopher's Stone. And I need many more souls before this half-finished rock is complete."

"I noticed the souls you already stole. There are a lot of comatose people in a lot of different hospitals. Just how many victims have you had?"

"Victims? From your perspective maybe. On their own, their lives were trivial and unproductive. Inside this stone, they're forging the most powerful object in history. There is no higher purpose they could serve. Tell me, Flash, is what I'm doing to them really so bad?"

"You've never once had a volunteer. What does that tell you? I'm going to destroy that stone before you can complete it and release every soul you've captured."

Barry rose to his feet and watched the two super-powered humans.

The Flash tried to run, but his feet were stuck to the ground. While they were talking, Dr. Alchemy transformed the concrete into a tar-like substance without anyone noticing.

"Please remain still while your soul is extracted," Dr. Alchemy said.

"Don't be too sure," the Flash replied confidently. "I've learned a few tricks of my own since we last met."

The outline of his body blurred, and his feet wouldn't stick to the ground anymore. The Flash was vibrating his molecules _through_ the tar-like substance.

Dr. Alchemy backed away. With his trap gone, all his confidence went with it. "I will not let you defeat me again!"

His half-finished stone glowed red, and the concrete turned into a powdery smoke. The Flash and Barry coughed and struggled to see. As soon as the Flash regained his breath, he spun his arms as fast as fan blades and blew the smoke away. But Dr. Alchemy was nowhere in sight.

The Flash ran around the building, then a short distance in several directions, then he came back. "He must be camouflaged somehow. I don't even know which direction he went. He's gone..."

He didn't waste any time sulking. The Flash raced into and out of the warehouse three times. Then he reappeared in front of Barry. "Are you all right?"

Barry didn't answer. He only stared at the man in red.

"There were three people inside. I took them to the nearest hospital," the Flash explained. "He already took their souls, but their bodies are alive, just unconscious. They'll be fine for a while... Were they your friends?"

Barry still wouldn't answer.

The Flash stared back with concern. He had wrinkles. He was getting old, but he still looked strong. "Hey, son, are you all right? Are you hurt?" He reached his hand out towards him.

"Stay back!" Barry shouted and backed away. "Keep your distance!"

The Flash twisted his eyebrows in surprise and confusion. "Don't be scared-"

"I don't want anything to do with you, you monster!" Barry shouted.

Barry wasn't scared. He was angry. This was an anger that had been building up for nearly ten years.

"What's wrong?" the Flash asked.

That question only increased Barry's anger. Everything that he went through since he was eleven, everything that he lost, and this man had the nerve to ask what was wrong. Like he didn't know.

"My mom is dead because of you, _that's_ what's wrong!" he yelled at him. "You killed her!"

The same expression as before, just stronger: surprise and confusion. The Flash stared at Barry for several seconds, and then he calmly said, "I didn't kill your mom."

"A man with super speed killed my mom and you _invented_ super speed!" he shot back. "Everything that ever happened is _your_ fault!"

The Flash watched him another moment, trying to decide how to respond. "Listen to me. I don't know who killed your mother, but I promise it wasn't me."

"SHUT UP!" Barry screamed. "I'm sick of hearing that! Everyone says that it wasn't you! Nobody thinks that you killed her, because you're the Flash! You're a hero, a crime fighter, a life saver, an icon of justice, this great wonderful person who would never do anything wrong. Everyone says that the Flash couldn't possibly have been the one who killed her, _but I saw you!_ "

 _Why am I saying this?_

The Flash could only stand there, looking hurt and puzzled, while Barry kept shouting at him. "I saw you! I saw a super-fast man running circles around the room! I was there! Everything was breaking, and mom was _screaming!_ She told me to run! She was _dying_ and she was just worried about me! And then you killed her! But NO! _No one_ would believe the Flash did it! The high-and-mighty Justice Society founder was ABOVE suspicion! It had to be my DAD instead!"

 _I know the Flash didn't really kill her. He doesn't deserve to hear this. What am I doing?_

"My dad didn't kill her, but they all thought he did! The police, my friends, teachers, psychiatrists! I told _everyone_ my dad was innocent! No one believed me! They thought I was delusional! They thought I was making things up to cover for him! No one would listen to me! I couldn't scream loud enough that I was telling the truth! He didn't do it but no one believed me! _No one ever believed me!_ "

The Flash grabbed his shoulders. " _I_ believe you!"

Barry stopped. It felt like all his rage simply spilled out of him.

"I believe you," he repeated. "But it _wasn't me_."

Tears ran down Barry's face. He sank to his knees and started sobbing.

.

Barry and the Flash sat on the curb, side by side. The Flash listened patiently and sympathetically. Barry told him the whole story about the day his mother died. He explained all the details to the best of his memory. It was a scene he replayed in his head countless times. Those minutes would probably never fade from his memory now.

Barry asked, "Do you have any idea who that man was?"

The Flash shook his head. "There aren't a lot of people who have super speed... I did have a 'Rival' of sorts in the old days, but he couldn't move as fast as what you're describing. I don't know anyone who can move that fast."

Barry lowered his head. He finally confronted his only lead, and he still had no clues. He fought down the urge to start crying again. The Flash, having no words, put a hand on Barry's shoulder.

"I'm sorry," Barry said. "I shouldn't have dumped all this on you. You don't even know me."

"I don't mind listening," he answered. "It sounds like you've been carrying a heavy load for a long time. I'm afraid I can't give you any easy answers, but it helps just to get it off your chest, doesn't it?"

"Why did you stay? You didn't have to. You could have just run off."

"Young man, I can't ignore someone who's hurting and needs help. I wouldn't be the Flash if I did... I realize that I can't fix everything, but I sure do my best to make things better than how I found them. Sometimes by catching a criminal... Sometimes just by lending a friendly ear."

Barry stared at him. "You're a much better person than I thought you were."

The Flash grinned. "I'll take that as a compliment."

"I'm sorry," Barry repeated. "The truth is I hated you for a long time... I hated anyone who had super powers for a long time..."

"Hating doesn't help anything, does it?"

He shook his head. "No, it doesn't."

The Flash rose to his feet. "Well, I didn't mind listening, but I do need to get going soon."

"Right, of course. What's gonna happen with that alchemy person?"

"Now that he knows I've caught his trail, Doctor Alchemy will lay low for a while. But he'll show up again soon enough. I'll be ready for him. As soon as I break that Philosopher's Stone all the souls inside will return to their bodies."

Barry stood up. "Good luck then, Flash... And thank you."

"Take care of yourself, Barry. I'll be glad to help out any way I can."

The Flash grinned and gave a casual salute, and then he took off. Barry stayed on the curb and watched him fade into the distance.

It was an amazing power, but deep down he still thought super speed was an awful thing to exist.

.

 _ **Author's Notes**_ : (8/30/2016) I promise, I intended to use Doctor Alchemy in this story long before he was announced as the villain for season 3 Flash. You would believe that if I didn't take so long to post this.

I'm not sure if using souls for fuel is a thing in actual alchemy legends; that's probably just from the manga "Fullmetal Alchemist." Whatever.

Chapter title comes from the song "Half Jack" by the Dresden Dolls.


	6. Chapter 6

_**They never found the magic words to change this fact (I'm half Jill and half Jack)**_

.

A few days later there was a knock on the door, and Barry answered. It was Rudy, alone.

Rudy's expression was frantic and scared - Barry wasn't used to seeing him like that. "Is Wally here?!"

Barry blinked back in confusion. "No, why?"

Iris came into the hallway. "What's going on?"

"Wally ran away," Rudy said quickly. "He snuck out of the house. I thought he might have come here."

"He's only five. He couldn't get this far by himself," Barry blurted. "He doesn't even know the way."

"I know that! But I'm running out of places to look."

"Did you call dad?" Iris asked. She really meant if he called the police.

Rudy ran his fingers through his hair. "Not yet. I just got in the car and started driving. I thought I'd find him by now. Mary's out looking too, but she stayed close to the house. We looked everywhere."

"Rudy, you can't drive when you're this upset," Iris told him. "That's just asking for an accident."

"I know but-"

She interrupted. "Barry, call the police station. Let dad know what happened. Get some officers out looking. Rudy, give me your keys. I'll drive, you look out the windows."

When things got bad, Iris buried her stress and kept focused and efficient. It's one of the things Barry liked about her.

"I need to get my purse. My license's inside." Iris rushed into another room.

Rudy was still standing outside the open doorway. He shifted on his feet and ran his hand through his hair again. "It's all my fault. I shouldn't have yelled at him."

Barry had never seen Rudy freak out like this before. He'd always had a temper, but being fidgety - that was new. "Rudy, it's gonna be okay. We're gonna find him." Barry tried to smile for him. "Don't worry. _Every_ kid tries running away at some point."

"No they don't, Barry! That's just you!" he snapped.

The smile dropped.

Rudy covered his face for a moment. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry," he said quietly. Rudy apologizing - that was another first.

"Rudy... Trust me. We _will_ bring him back home."

Iris came back with her purse. She looked at Barry expectantly. "Barry! Phone!"

"Oh, right!" He ran back to make the call.

.

The West family split up and searched all over town.

 _Should I consider myself part of the West family? ...Am I_ allowed _to be part of the West family?_

Barry ran down the sidewalk. He stopped and panted for breath, keeping an eye out for any glimpse of red hair.

Barry tried running away several times in the months after his dad was arrested. Sometimes to get to the prison, sometimes just to get away from the West house. He didn't think of it as 'home' back then. He still wasn't sure he should think of it that way. One more thing to worry about once he graduated college.

He hoped his own runaway attempts would provide some special insight into where Wally was right now. But Barry's brain wasn't giving him any quick answers.

 _Back then, did I want no one to find me? Or was I waiting for someone to find me?_

He started running again.

"Excuse me, I'm looking for a missing child. His name's Wally. Five years old. Red hair, green eyes, freckles. Have you seen anyone who looks like that?"

No matter which passerby Barry asked, the answer was always no.

He tried thinking about it logically. Wally's parents would have already looked in all the obvious places. If Barry was going to find him, he would have to think of a spot that wasn't obvious - a place only Wally would think of... But that wouldn't work because Barry didn't know Wally well enough to get inside his head.

Then again, Wally probably wasn't going anywhere specific. He was probably just lost. He was too young to know much about street signs or addresses. But maybe he'd notice something that looked familiar and wander towards that...

Except Barry had no idea which places Wally had seen before. He didn't know which parks or playgrounds his parents took him to, or if they went out at all. He didn't know any of Wally's interests, which was why he could never figure out what present to mail to him on Christmas and birthdays.

Barry didn't know anything about Wally.

Why would he?

That little boy was just a stranger who dropped into his life.

And yet...

.

Barry arrived in another park. Not a playground, just a lot of open space and a few trees. A little child was sitting against one of those trees, with his knees pulled up to his chest and his head lowered. He was tearing up a dead leaf to keep his fingers busy.

"Wally!"

The boy instinctively looked up. Barry sprinted over to him. In retrospect, he didn't know if Wally would be happy to be found or if he'd try to run off again. Barry should have been more cautious. But at the time he just didn't want to wait.

He stopped directly in front of Wally and kneeled down to be eye-level with him. Wally was still and quiet. Barry smiled at him. "Hey... Remember me? Uncle Barry?"

Wally didn't answer.

"You okay? ...You know, everyone's out looking for you. We were all really worried about you."

Wally frowned and lowered his head again.

"C'mon, let's go home."

"No," he said stubbornly.

"Wally..."

"I don' wanna." He hugged his knees. "I'm never goin' back."

"Are you just going to sit here in this park for the rest of your life?"

"Uh-huh."

Barry gave a little sigh, but he was actually amused. Little kids were so serious about what they said even when they put no thought at all into it. "Your daddy's sorry he yelled at you."

"No he's not." Adamant.

"Yes, he is. He really is. I know parents can drive you nuts sometimes. But they love you." Barry remembered how worried Rudy was about his son. "Your mom and dad love you very, very much. So come home. Please?"

Wally still didn't stop frowning. "I wanna new mommy an' daddy."

Barry winced a little at that response. "Don't say that. Remember how you said you wanted all your family members to be together?"

"Nope. I never said that."

Kids.

"Wally-"

"We're movin'," he said suddenly. "Mommy an' daddy say they wanna move."

Barry blinked. He didn't know that.

"We're gonna go far 'way," he said miserably. "I don' wanna go... But when I talked back... he..."

Barry wished he knew what he was supposed to say.

"Can you be my daddy?" Wally asked suddenly.

"What?!"

Wally stood up. "Please? I wanna new daddy." He stepped forward on his wobbly legs and hugged Barry. "Please...?"

Barry froze. Then he hugged him back, but only for a moment. He pushed Wally away so he could look into his face. "Wally... You can't choose your family."

As soon as Barry said that, he realized it applied to him too. He didn't choose to have a dad in prison. He didn't choose to have a mom who was dead. And he didn't choose to become the West family's foster child. That's just the way it was.

Maybe it's _because_ he didn't choose it that he really was part of the family.

"A family isn't something you can decide. And it's not something you can deny. It's just something that happens... Just a group of strangers who drop into each other's lives, and make the most of it... So listen, Wally. No matter what happens, no matter where you go, your family will always be your family, like it or not. But that goes for all of us. Your mom and dad, Grandpa Joe, Aunt Iris... and me. No matter how far away you are I will _always_ be your uncle. I promise."

"Yeah, far 'way," he mumbled.

"You can visit us. And I'll visit you."

Wally looked at him with big sad eyes. "A lot?"

"Not every day, but a lot." Barry smiled and leaned in closer. "But only if you're good."

Wally nodded eagerly. "I promise to be good."

Barry nodded back. Then he looked behind Wally. On the ground, behind the tree, was a thick broken branch. It was a dead piece of wood from which all the leaves had fallen off. Barry looked up and saw that the tree they were next to was completely bare and shriveled. All the trees in the park were bare.

"How did I not notice that...?" he muttered as he looked around.

He'd seen this before.

"Unca' Barry?"

He looked back to Wally and forced on a smile. "Okay Wally, we need to go home right now. Give me your hand."

Barry stood up, holding tightly onto the little boy's hand. "Walk fast. Keep quiet and walk fast."

"Wha's wrong...?"

"Don't be scared, just-" Barry froze.

Standing in the distance was a man in dark robes, staring at the two of them.

"Wally, get behind me."

"Unc-"

"Just do it!" he snapped.

Doctor Alchemy calmly stepped towards them. "It's you again... And you have company..."

"Don't touch him," Barry glared at the villain. "Don't you _dare_ touch him."

"Why not?" he asked without emotion. "Is he important?"

Barry didn't respond.

Doctor Alchemy said, "You look at me the same way he does. The Flash, I mean. You have such contempt for me. I'm not bantering; I'm really asking. Are the lives I take really so important?"

"Of course they are."

"But there are _billions_ of lives in this world, and only one of these." He took the half-finished Philosopher's Stone out of his cloak. "If people are important, why are they so easy to replace?"

Barry didn't know how to answer. Wally was silent. He didn't really understand what the two grown-ups were saying, but he was getting scared instinctively.

"We are all meaningless. We amount to nothing in the cosmic scheme of universe. We're just tiny bits of dust, clinging to a small pebble in space, revolving around a ball of fire. But the perfectly complete Philosopher's Stone will be the power of creation itself. I suppose what I'm trying to say is... I won't stop for anything."

Barry spoke to the boy behind him while keeping his eyes on the terror in front. "Wally, when I tell you to run, _run_. It doesn't matter where. Just get out of here as fast as you can."

"Unca' Barry?" It sounded like he was trying not to cry.

Barry needed a weapon. He had to buy as much time for Wally as possible. He remembered the tree branch on the ground. He turned and quickly ran to grab the branch. He ran back, but Doctor Alchemy was gone.

STAB!

Barry turned around. Wally was staring up at him with wide eyes... and a clawed hand had torn right through his torso.

"Unca' Barry...?"

Doctor Alchemy drew his hand back. There was no hole left in Wally's chest or shirt. There was no wound at all, as if nothing had ever happened. But Wally dropped to the ground. The boy's face had lost its color, and his eyes were open, staring into nothingness.

Barry froze. He had more than frozen. Time had completely stopped for him. Time was meaningless as he looked at that boy on the ground.

The alchemist held a glowing light in his hand, which he nonchalantly fed into the red stone in his other hand. "That boy's soul is in here now. His body is as good as dead without it. But look around. The world didn't end, did it? The world isn't any worse off for losing that one simple child."

Wally West was lying perfectly still on the ground. He wasn't even breathing.

"AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Barry sprinted towards the man and smashed the tree branch against him. "BRING HIM BACK!" He used so much force the wooden branch broke apart. Doctor Alchemy recoiled from the attack, and Barry continued to attack with the broken stick he had left, striking and stabbing, again and again.

.

 _"Hi, Unca' Barry."_

 _"If you tell 'em your daddy's not a bad guy, they'll let him go."_

 _"I want all my granpas and granmas together. I want everyone together."_

 _"Grown-ups say they'll do it soon but they never do."_

 _"You're my unca' so he's my granpa."_

 _"We're a big family."_

 _"Can I help?"_

 _"I promise to be good."_

 _"Unca' Barry...?"_

.

"BRING HIM BACK! BRING HIM BACK! BRING HIM BACK! BRING HIM BACK! BRING HIM BACK! BRING HIM BACK! BRING HIM BACK!"

At some point during the barrage, Doctor Alchemy dropped the Philosopher's Stone.

 _Flash said if that stone breaks, the people will wake up_.

Barry quickly turned away from him and focused all his energy on breaking that stone. He pounded it with what was left of the splintered tree branch, but that didn't do anything. Barry frantically looked around the ground for something else, saw a decent-sized rock, grabbed it and started hitting it against the Philosopher's Stone.

Barry struck the rock against the stone again and again. The rock in his hands cracked and little chips flew off. But the red stone on the ground seemed unchanged. He kept pounding with all of his strength, grunting with each effort. He had no idea how long he stayed like that. His arms began to ache, but he ignored it. He panted for breath, but he ignored that too. His fingers hurt.

Eventually he ran out of strength and was forced to stop. He sat on the ground breathing heavily. His hands were scratched up and bruised, and the rock was chipped away. But the Philosopher's Stone was undamaged.

Doctor Alchemy calmly stepped towards him. The wounds on his skin and cloak were repairing themselves. "Are you finished?"

Barry felt something wet on his face. He heard a strange sound. After a moment he realized the sound was moaning. Another moment later he realized it was coming from him.

Doctor Alchemy casually reached down and picked up the stone. He looked down at Barry with something vaguely similar to pity. "This is just what I mean. You poor people rant and rave about how important your feelings are, but feelings don't get you anything. Power is the only thing that matters."

"SHUT UP!"

Barry glared up at him. "What good does power do?! Does it let people be like you?! What good are _you_?!"

He stood and faced him. "It doesn't matter how much power you get! It doesn't matter how many of those stupid stones you make! As long as they're being used by someone like _you_ , they're useless! Power is _only_ useful when it's being used to _protect_ people! People like him!" He pointed to Wally's body. "You think he's not important?! _How stupid are you?!_ Helping kids like him get home is the most important thing in the entire world!"

A proud and strong voice spoke up. "Well said, Mister Allen. I couldn't have put it any better myself."

The Flash was here.

"He found me!" Doctor Alchemy cried.

The Flash turned and ran away from them at super speed.

The alchemist panicked but before he could move Barry grabbed him from behind, wrapping his arms tightly around his neck and waist. "You're not going anywhere!"

"Let go of me!" he shouted as he struggled to get away, holding up his stone.

It only took the Flash a few seconds to run the required distance. Then he spun around on the spot, braced himself, aimed, and ran. He built up his maximum speed as he ran.

He exceeded Mach 1.

Broke the sound barrier.

For a Supersonic Punch.

WHAM!

The Flash's punch made direct contact with the Philosopher's Stone.

CRASH!

In a burst of light, the stone completely shattered. The force sent Barry and the alchemist tumbling back. And countless lights raced away from the explosion and flew all over the city... One of those lights went into Wally's body. The little boy gasped.

"No! No...!"

Doctor Alchemy rushed to his feet and tried to run, but the Flash sent another punch right to his cheek. The villain fell to the ground, knocked out in one hit.

"Wally!" Barry ran over to where the boy was. His eyes were closed, but he was breathing normally.

"He'll be fine," the Flash said. "He's just sleeping now. When he wakes up he'll be good as new."

Barry believed him. The color was already returning to Wally's cheeks. Barry gently picked up the sleeping child and held him close. Barry thought he might start crying... but it might be the first time he cried from happiness.

"Is that your little brother?" the Flash asked.

Barry smiled. "No. He's my nephew." He repeated, "This is my nephew... He's my family."

He stood up, carrying and hugging the sleeping child. He looked at the hero with tears in his eyes. "Thank you... Thank you so much, Flash."

"Jay."

"Huh?"

"Jay Garrick," he said with a smile. "You can call me Jay."

The Flash just told Barry his name.

"But-"

"It's fine. My secret identity was never much of a secret to begin with - obviously," he said with a gesture to his unmasked face.

Barry looked down at the redhead in his arms, and then back up at the speedster. "I can't thank you enough... Jay."

Jay shook his head. "Don't worry about it, Barry. It's like you said: Helping people find their families is the most important thing in the world."

He looked over to the unconscious villain. "Time to bring him back to prison. And I'll be back in Keystone City after that. But if you ever need my help again... look me up," he finished with an easy smile.

Barry smiled and said nothing. Days and days wouldn't be enough time to express all the emotions he was feeling.

The Flash carried the villain away at super speed. Barry stayed behind in the park. He looked down at the sleeping boy, and hugged him a little tighter.

.

Barry slowly walked down the sidewalk, carrying Wally piggyback style. They were going home.

Wally's eyes fluttered. "Unca' Barry...?" he said drowsily.

"It's okay, Wally. You had a bad dream. That's all," Barry told him. "Go back to sleep."

"M'kay..." And it sounded like Wally did just that.

Barry continued walking... and thinking.

Power.

Barry always thought power was something that destroyed. For the very first time, he began to understand it was also something that could be used for good. What's more, power was sometimes necessary.

" _What do_ _ **you**_ _want to do, Barry?_ "

In the end, Barry couldn't stop worrying about other people. His father, the people he cared about, even total strangers... He wanted to save as many of them as he could.

Barry believed that the speedster who killed his mother was still out there somewhere. He needed to be ready for when he appeared again. Even if he found him, there was nothing he could do to stop him the way he was now. He used to hate the very idea of super speed.

But you need poison to fight poison.

You need venom to make anti-venom.

And he had someone to protect now.

 _Dear Dad_

 _I've been thinking a lot about my future. About you, the Wests, and myself. I've been a little indecisive about what I want to do with my life. I still don't have all the answers. But I recently got a new idea about the path I want to take. I think I understand now..._

Barry continued walking, carrying that important child on his back.

 _...what it is that I really want to do._

.

"Hello, is this the Garrick residence? ... Jay? ... This is Barry Allen. Do you remember me? ... I hope you don't mind. I looked up your number in the phone book. ... Well, um... I-I'm thinking of doing a term paper about the physics of superpowers. Is there any way we could meet up so I could talk to you? See, I want to know...

"How exactly does someone get super speed?"

.

 _ **Run, Jack (Run)**_

.

 _ **Author's Notes**_ : (9/13/2016) I realize that it's unrealistic for a five-year-old child to run that far from home before anyone found him. Just go with it. Barry's fight with Dr. Alchemy is clearly based on the pilot chapter of the manga "Buso Renkin." Chapter title comes from the song "Half Jack" by the Dresden Dolls.

Please review. Let me know what you think of this story.


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